We had a special visitor tonight. I'm torn at what to call him since none of the typical names seem to fit exactly. He is Meister's biological dad, but he was also there for his birth. He is Meister's birth dad, but he was there for him more than just birth. He is Meister's first dad, but that implies that now that there is a second dad, he isn't his dad at all anymore. Our other kids call him Uncle K*, so Meister has taken to calling him Uncle K, too.
Uncle K came to visit for the first time since Meister was adopted 2.5 years ago. The first picture below brings tears to my eyes. I love both of these guys. One as a brother, and one as a son. I desperately want the best for both of them, and yet we had to make a tough choice 2.5 years ago. I never dreamed that reconciliation after that choice would be made so quickly. I imagined Meister going through life wondering what ever happened to Uncle K, wondering if he ever thought about him, wondering if he ever cared, and basically feeling abandoned.
And, yet, here we are while Meister is still fairly young and amazingly Uncle K is back in his life. Meister responded so appropriately - little timid at first, but warmed up and obviously held some tenderness in his heart for Uncle K. He was deliberately re-anchoring himself in our family unit by coming back to Pete and I for cuddles and by intentionally using our names (Mom and Dad) often.
So now Meister doesn't have to wonder if Uncle K ever cared. I can put pictures like these in his scrapbook, and he can know that he is special and cared for.
Not that this visit changes anything for Meister on a daily basis - Uncle K will probably not be around much, and life will go on as normal for Meister. But at the same time, visits like this will make a huge difference for Meister as he grows up.